The Original Rabbit-Hole.

We all know what the real rabbit-hole is — and we all know that it leads to Wonderland. (Or Underland, if you’re a fan of the Tim Burton movie. Which I am.)

Have you ever wanted to escape to Wonderland? I know I sure have. It looks like this:


But I suppose it can look however you want it to look. Sometimes it has pink and purple ribbons, and polka-dotted elephants. Wouldn’t it be great to have a polka-dotted elephant? I don’t know why in the world it ended up on the Island of Misfit Toys.

My favorite Wonderland saying is that of the Mock Turtle.


“What matters it how far we go?” his scaly friend replied. “There is another shore, you know, upon the other side. The further off from England, the nearer is to France — Then turn not pale, beloved snail, but come and join the dance!”

Will you come and join the dance? Or have you already? I don’t know what took me so long. I don’t think I’ve got the steps right yet; but I’m working on it. Hopefully it never gets as strenuous as the tango. That seems like it would make you too sweaty.

Do you remember the caterpillar? Oh, right — who the heck doesn’t remember the smoking caterpillar? Okay.


The caterpillar asked Alice who she was — and she said, she hardly knew, for though she knew who she was that morning, she was sure she must have changed several times since then. The caterpillar told her to explain herself; but she couldn’t explain herself, because she wasn’t herself, you see.

Some days I’m myself, and some days I’m not! Some days I’m Lucille Ball; and some days I’m Grace Kelly. Some days I’m Lady Gaga, and you know you have to look at me, ’cause I’m that cool. But some days I’m Susan Boyle when she was standing in front of Simon Cowell. She came a long way, though! Go, Susan, go, Susan — it’s your birthday, it’s your birthday . . .

Susan Boyle would think I’m so weird right now.

But anyway — do you want to come to my tea party? I’m having one this afternoon. Consider yourself invited, and bring the cakes.


I’ll be the March Hare standing on the table, ’cause I’ve already gotten into the wine.



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